


Someone to Stay

by backtothefold



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Drug Abuse, Drug Use, Eventual Romance, F/M, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Survivor Guilt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-05-11
Packaged: 2020-02-29 15:38:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18781204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/backtothefold/pseuds/backtothefold
Summary: Based on the song,Someone to Stayby Vancouver Sleep Clinic."You were alone left out in the cold,Clinging to the ruin of your broken homeToo lost and hurting to carry your loadWe all need someone to hold""You've been fighting the memory all on your ownNothing washes, nothing growsI know how it feels being by yourself in the rainWe all need someone to stayWe all need someone to stay..."





	1. Nightmare

_Shaun’s cries echo throughout the building. She frantically searches for him, running through corridors of unfamiliar territory. “Shaun! Mommy’s coming!”_

_Every door she opens leads to a brick wall. His wails get louder and louder as she approaches the next door. She charges through, only to freefall straight down 50 feet. She braces herself and desperately attempts to break her fall. Someway, somehow._

_She’s expecting to splatter all over the ground; instead, she is jolted by a grenade blast. The blast throws her into the side of a dilapidated building. The ringing in her ears deafens her surroundings, making her unaware of the figure aiming a gun behind her. She whips around as two bullets whiz past her, grazing a loose strand of hair. The figure behind her falls to the ground, dead. Another figure appears before her and lifts her into his arms._

_“Arh uh kay?” She can’t make out what the person is saying.  
“What?!” She unintentionally yells back._

_The man puts his hand over her mouth and puts a finger towards his lips. Her eyes follow his towards another figure searching their location. He grabs his rifle and fires a shot. Once he checks that the other man is dead, he returns his attention to her. The ringing in her ears starts to subside._

_“Are you okay?”_

_He grazes her body with both his hands to check for any injuries. She winces as he brushes along the back of her head and her left shoulder blade. There’s blood when he draws his hand away. Her eyes slowly register the face before her._

_“Nate?” She cries out and reaches for him.  
“Hey, hey, hey. You’re okay. I’ve got you, Maeve. Can’t have our favorite combat medic getting injured.”_

_As he bandages her up, he kisses her. She missed his lips on hers, his touch, his smile, his voice. She missed Nate. When she opens her eyes, she’s expecting to see Nate’s loving eyes. She sees his lifeless eyes stare at her instead._  


\------  


Her breath gets caught in her chest, and it progressively tightens as she panics. She stretches her arms out chaotically and clumsily. She’s expecting to bump into the nightstand and spilling her glass of water like she always does at home. Waiting for Codsworth to come bumbling in to clean it up in the wee hours of the night. _No, this isn’t home. You don’t have a home anymore._  
All she sees is blurry darkness, so she sits up and does small breathing exercises to calm her heart down. She looks up at the sky and wonders how something so beautiful and infinite reminds her of everything and _everyone_ she’s lost?

“Is something the matter, soldier?”

Her heart half-expects that it’s Nate calling out to her, but her head knows better. When she doesn’t answer, she hears the mechanical clomps of power armor making its way towards her. She’s going to get an earful for not speaking when spoken to. 

“Knight? Knight Quinn.”

“Yes, Paladin?”

He kneels down beside her, as much as the T-60 will allow him. He’s trying to appear caring and kind, but his eyes betray him. She’s waiting for them to crease into pre-crow’s feet like Nate’s, but it doesn’t. Typical soldier’s eyes. They’re always calculating, expecting and preparing for the worst. She knows them all too well. After all, she has them too. She watches the paladin decide where to place his hand. At first, it reaches towards her knee only to change course and awkwardly perch on her shoulder.

“Are you alright, Knight?”

 _No, no I’m not, Danse. I’ve lost my husband, my son, my life. My purpose in this world. If I’m not a wife or a mother, then what am I? I never wanted to become a soldier again; I already fought for my country. And for what? Just to be put in an icebox and woken up 200 years into this bullshit? I wish that man had killed me too or perhaps just me because Nate would have a better idea on how to handle this world than I ever will_.

“Yes, sir,” is what she opts for instead. She flashes him a small smile.

He sighs and his eyes soften a bit. 

“You’ve proven yourself to me, to the Brotherhood. You’ve earned my trust, I hope that you know that you can talk to me, about anything.”

The sky has turned from pitch black to a lighter purple, signifying that daybreak is drawing close. She shivers as a breeze passes them. Something warm drapes around her shoulders. Danse had grabbed a blanket from a rucksack.

“Get some rest, soldier. We move out at 0600.”

She snuggles under the blanket, waiting for him to leave. After what seems like an eternity, she starts to drift to sleep. She’s surprised to see the paladin still sitting beside her. She reaches out and grabs onto a finger or toe and whispers, “thank you,” before falling asleep.


	2. Selfish Reasons

The Commonwealth is an unforgiving place. It seeks to swallow you whole and spit you out as a malevolent being. Everyone has an ulterior motive in this world. It’s not so unlike her world where everyone sought for someone else to do their dirty work. The Railroad hates the Brotherhood of Steel and the Institute. The Brotherhood of Steel hates anyone that doesn’t align with them. The Institute is the local boogeyman. The Minutemen has an original member that refuses to step up. Raiders kill for their take. Settlers keep to themselves. 

And then, there’s Maeve. A woman out of place, in limbo. In times of war, it’s difficult to maintain honor. However, in her eyes, your individual moral compass is the only way to keep sane. “ _Keep your head on a swivel,_ ” their C.O. once shouted. She and Nate always had each other’s six since the beginning of time, of a different time. 

She doesn’t know which darkness will swallow her first: the Commonwealth’s or her own. Are they one and the same? Fuck if she knows nor has the intention to find out. She gets cold more easily than she recalls. She finds herself rubbing up and down her arms, subconsciously lingering on the scar on her left shoulder blade. She smiles sadly as she reminisces the memory. She looks up to Rhys’s disdainful expression.

“I don’t get why we have to work with her.”  
“She’s part of the Brotherhood now, that’s why.”  
“She doesn’t bleed like we do. She doesn’t understand what’s at stake.”  
“She’s no different from our other brothers and sisters.”  
“She almost got you killed yesterday,” Rhys growls.

He’s still angry for the day before. Can’t say she blames him. Haylen tries to excuse it every time it comes up. Danse is expressionless, which almost always means he’s disappointed.

Haylen walks away from Rhys with a huff. She brings a bowl to Danse, who is watching the perimeter. She hands another bowl to Maeve.

“It’s Cram and Pork ‘N Beans, which is pretty much an upgrade to the glop we get served on the Prydwen.”  
“Thanks, Haylen.”

Cooking it down help reduces the radiation, but damn, if Cram didn’t give Maeve flashbacks. Even after they discharged from the military, Nate and her still ate Cram. They had a pretty bad hoarder situation that actually played in their favor when inflation hit. It never expired then, and it kind of held true today. She chokes back a cry/chuckle. She doesn’t know if Haylen notices her pity party or is just that nice not to intrude on a private memory.  
“I’m sorry, Haylen,” she begins.

Haylen just put a spoonful of dinner in her mouth, so she puts up her hand and waves in protest. 

“No, listen to me. I’m sorry I froze, I don’t know why I froze.” _You know exactly why you did._  
“It’s okay, Maeve. We all freak out once in a while. I can’t imagine the Commonwealth is what you expected.”  
“Rhys is right, I’m not Brotherhood.”  
“But you are my friend, right?”  
“Yeah, I’d like to think so.”  
“Then, you’re Brotherhood.” She smiles reassuringly at Maeve, which helps her relax a little.

Maeve gives Haylen a playful nudge.

“I don’t give a shit what Rhys says, but I’m pretty sure he still has feelings for you.”  
“He would say that for any of us. We’re all his family.”  
“While you were resting, he reamed into me so bad I was pretty sure we were going to wake up a nest of ferals. Ask Danse. He’ll confirm it.”

Haylen blushes and turns away to hide the corners of her mouth curving upwards. Maeve gently brushes against Haylen’s injured leg.

“We all need someone. So hold onto him.”  
“Knight Quinn. A word,” a voice interrupts their girl bonding.  


\--------  


She’s been dreading this conversation since the incident. He’s standing at attention and they don’t say anything for several minutes.

“What are you doing here, soldier?”  
“You wanted to talk, so…here I am,” Maeve replies.  
“What are you doing here?!” he shouts and punches the wall behind her.

She stares back at him, unflinchingly.

“I know why you froze that day. I will **not** have you endangering my people for your own selfish reasons!”

She looks down, ashamed, but not in disagreement. He lifts her chin up to meet his eyes.

“If you do this fucking shit again, I won’t hesitate to put you down,” he says through gritted teeth.

She caresses his cheek and softly replies, “as you should, Paladin.”


End file.
